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There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.There is another theory which states that this has already happened.

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He hoped and prayed that there wasn't an afterlife. Then he realized there was a contradiction involved here and merely hoped that there wasn't an afterlife.

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For a moment, nothing happened. Then, after a second or so, nothing continued to happen.

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Time is an illusion. Lunchtime doubly so.

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It is a well-known fact that those people who must want to rule people are, ipso facto, those least suited to do it... anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job.

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The Guide is definitive. Reality is frequently inaccurate.

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If somebody thinks they're a hedgehog, presumably you just give 'em a mirror and a few pictures of hedgehogs and tell them to sort it out for themselves.

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I'm spending a year dead for tax reasons.

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“There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.
There is another theory which states that this has already happened.”

Douglas Adams


“A learning experience is one of those things that says, 'You know that thing you just did? Don't do that.”

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“You live and learn. At any rate, you live.”

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“I'd take the awe of understanding over the awe of ignorance any day.”

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“If you try and take a cat apart to see how it works, the first thing you have on your hands is a non-working cat.”

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“He hoped and prayed that there wasn't an afterlife. Then he realized there was a contradiction involved here and merely hoped that there wasn't an afterlife.”

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“All opinions are not equal. Some are a very great deal more robust, sophisticated and well supported in logic and argument than others.”

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Isn't it enough to see that a garden is beautiful without having to believe that there are fairies at the bottom of it too?

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We have normality. I repeat, we have normality. Anything you still can't cope with is therefore your own problem.

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